From the Grammar Police

Oct 25

Behold. Life fades. Death cometh. The last shimmering rays of the sun throw bleak shadows on the fields of wheat. It is the time of the hasvest.

Nope. Beefsteak.

Oh dear. This again. You cannot direct a bridge to be closed. It’s a bridge. You can’t order a dog to be euthanized. It’s a dog. And you can’t ask a speaker to be removed. Can you? You have to ask other people to do those things.

Les choses ont terriblement mal tourné! We saw this in the Paris airport. In any language, it’s wrong. Many bags look alike. Not all of them. (And period, not comma, after alike.)

This is a minor nit, but a rule nevertheless. A horse chomps on an apple. It champs at the bit in its mouth. That’s an old English term for the animal grinding on it. But language evolves. The Associated Press stylebook, the bible for the “Horribly Wrong” team, now says either is acceptable. But don’t use it! It’s a cliché.

And we go to the video archives! Click for Segment 19: Everyone Still Doesn’t Like Grammar! https://youtu.be/EpaisXp1J0s?si=PLSowZ67tAA1KLEe

Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong" features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police.” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, menus, TV news graphics, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we can credit you properly. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com

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NOTE: Eliot and Lou Ann are available for speaking engagements, and can travel. Reach us through the comments section. Just think of all of your employees getting back to work on a Monday, their heads filled with all the ways we’ve shown them to be better communicators!

Eliot Kleinberg