From the Grammar Police
Keith Nelson
We’ve said many times that writing headlines is tough. But this one suggests folks were conducting a search for something, and then a boat capsized and they had to stop. Try: “Authorities call off search for boat that capsized near San Diego.”
You still cannot require a vaccine or a homeless encampment to do anything. You order humans to do these things. Interestingly, in the second one, the folks later fixed the problem by removing “to.” The reader then assumes the word “that” after “ordered,” and the headline works: “Trump orders homeless encampments be cleared in DC.”
A flare is something you fire into the sky from a sinking boat. This place had flair.
Bruce Moore
Recent edition.
A Segway is a brand of vehicle. A transition would be a segue.
Whoops. This headline suggests a judge was asked whether he had unsealed transcripts, and he said, “Not me!” Of course, that’s not what happened. The judge did what judges often do; deny a request that files be unsealed.
The sentence says the woman talked to police during the overnight hours. Oh, what a difference a comma makes! “During the overnight hours, so-and-so told law enforcement, she awoke to a noise.”
Back in April 2022, we asserted that the term “Breaking News” had become so devalued it was approaching the status of a cliché, if it wasn’t there already. We now officially declare it has lost all value. Presidents hold cabinet meetings pretty regularly; sometimes once a week. How is that breaking news? Will we now use the term for someone going out for the mail? News producers: This used to be reserved for plane crashes and assassinations. Shame on you.
Readers: Our Aug. 31 Grammar Police segment led off with the ridiculous, “Avoid and eschew the unnecessary and unwanted addition and usage and inclusion of unnecessary words and phrases and words!” We said we got that down to three words, and challenged you to do the same. The solution, of course, was William Strunk’s Golden Rule: “Avoid unnecessary words.”
And we go to the video archives for Segment 90: The original “Close but no cigar.”
Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong" features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police.” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, menus, TV news graphics, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we can credit you properly. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com
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NOTE: Eliot and Lou Ann are available for speaking engagements, and can travel. Reach us through the comments section. Just think of all of your employees getting back to work on a Monday, their heads filled with all the ways we’ve shown them to be better communicators!